


Suppressed

by Leloi



Category: Sherlock (TV), Sherlock Holmes & Related Fandoms
Genre: Alpha John, Alpha/Omega, Babies, F/M, Knotting, M/M, Mating Cycles/In Heat, Omega Sherlock, Omegaverse, POV First Person, Pining, Polyamory, Premature Babies, Season/Series 03, Unplanned Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-05
Updated: 2014-03-04
Packaged: 2018-01-11 07:11:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 16,951
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1170173
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Leloi/pseuds/Leloi
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I did not expect John at that moment.  I planned for all but him.  Don’t get me wrong, I fantasized about what would happen if a random alpha entered my flat and had their way with me.  The toys helped that fantasy along and allowed me to work my way through my heat.  I wasn’t expecting John Watson in all his alpha glory to open the door and look at me.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings For:  
> Hormonal Sherlock feeling unloved and unwanted.
> 
> Thoughts of abortion, worry about miscarriage and other pregnancy related issues.
> 
> Magnussen. Seriously... If you've seen the new season, you know what I'm talking about. He's just THAT much worse in Omegaverse. (And he was a lot of fun to write... I should play with him in the future.)
> 
> This story weaves in and out of season 3. Some parts are vague, just commenting on something that happens in the show. This story just "fills in holes" with some scenes slightly rewritten to compensate for what I've written.

I stared at my bottle of suppressants. For two years I had lived without them and allowed natural rhythm of heats to take over my body once every three months. They came in handy when I was undercover and needed information from an alpha. Many lose all control when they are around an omega approaching estrus. I never allowed any of them to mount me, of course. I could not risk accidentally finding myself bonded to someone I should not. That and pheromones from an unbonded omega were stronger than a bonded omega. They had to want me. 

Now that I am home I just assumed I would resume my suppressants and return to the life I had. But as I stared at that bottle I began to wonder WHY. John was gone. 

It is difficult to remain unbonded in a city like London, but years of experience taught me the warning signs to know when to lock myself away.

Even if there was an accidental bonding with a random alpha… Well… I wasn’t getting any younger. 

John moved on… Why shouldn’t I? The only alpha I would ever consider bonding with found someone else to take my place.

And I was lonely.

So the suppressants were set back in the cabinet. It took me several days to learn to forget about them. My next heat would be due in two months.

^.~

I had everything I needed for my heat. Food and water were stocked. Toys were set out, ready for my use. Two days into it I was laying on the sofa, coming down from a particularly powerful orgasm when my front door opened. I did not expect John at that moment. I planned for all but him. Don’t get me wrong, I fantasized about what would happen if a random alpha entered my flat and had their way with me. The toys helped that fantasy along and allowed me to work my way through my heat. I wasn’t expecting John Watson in all his alpha glory to open the door and look at me.

I was on my knees, shoulders and face pressed against the arm of the sofa with one hand holding the toy in place. 

John blinked at me, his nostrils flaring at my scent. And then he shut the door and locked it but remained where he was.

I pulled out the toy and set it on the table before sitting down. “John.”

John’s eyes were on the toy, watching some of my fluids slide down to the base and leak onto the table. “You’re in heat.”

“Observant.” I answered.

“Why aren’t you on suppressants?” John swallowed hard, his eyes still on the toy.

“I’ve been off them the past two years.” I answered.

“You haven’t bonded with anyone while you were off them… Have you?” There was a note of worry in his voice.

“Do I smell like any other alpha?” I challenged.

John flared his nostrils and shook his head once he analyzed my scent. “Why are you doing this? Why now?” Closing his eyes, he wearily rubbed his face with the back of his hand. “You didn’t want to bond… You couldn’t be bothered with heat or bonding. Why now? Damn you…”

I got up from the sofa and approached him as if he was a wild animal about to skitter off if I moved too quickly. “I… I need this now.”

“Sherlock…” John opened his eyes and caught me five feet away from him. “Oh gods, Sherlock… You smell fantastic… And I’m about to marry someone else.”

I found myself behind him, holding his warm body against my own. My canine lightly scraped at the back of his neck, taking in his powerful alpha scent. I wanted to bite and it took every bit of self-control not to mark him. “You don’t have to bond with me… Just…”

And then he spun around, pushing me back across the room until my feet tripped and I fell. Immediately he was on top of me, kissing my lips, pushing his tongue into my mouth as his fingers undid his trousers. I was flipped over onto my stomach, my hips lifted and something warm pushed into me. For a moment I was confused. Wasn’t John an alpha? Surely he should be at least a similar size to a toy used to simulate an alpha’s knot. 

“Oh gods, Sherlock…” John moaned from somewhere between my scapula… And then I felt it. His knot began to form and within a few strokes we were locked together… And John kept moving even though the knot limited his movement. “You are so fucking tight!”

“I’ve never been bred.” I answered, pushing back into him. “You’re the first.”

A whimper escaped him and I felt his teeth press against my back without breaking skin. How I wanted him to bite and bite hard… claiming me as his own. His tongue lapped at my skin as his fingers bit into my hips, pulling me back against him. And then he went still.

I could feel him pulse within me. Instinctively I clenched down on him and felt my own orgasm overwhelm me, making a mess upon the floor. My arms and legs gave out and I fell to the floor with John helplessly following me down. We lay there for some time… Me in a puddle of my own mess and John pressed against my back, unable to pull away. Every few minutes he grunted and gasped for air as another wave overwhelmed him. We were knotted together for at least thirty minutes before he was finally drained and softened enough to slip out of me. 

“Sherlock… I love you. I would be your alpha in a heartbeat if I believed that’s what you wanted.” Kissing my neck he gently rolled off of me. 

His words hurt. Of course I wanted him, how could he not see? But I knew I was also being affected by pheromones. Was he what I wanted because he was there with me at that moment? If any other alpha found me would I want them too? Of course not! John was John… My John. I rolled over onto my back and took his hand in my own, threading our fingers together. 

John’s other hand lightly pushed my hair from my face as he smiled down at me. “I love you.” Leaning down he kissed me lightly. “Say you want me and I’ll stay.”

I opened my mouth to answer him… But then I thought of Mary. I liked Mary. She did not deserve to have her alpha taken away. Two years ago I left him and Mary picked up the broken pieces I left behind. “Mary needs you.”

John bit his lip and sadness passed over his face before he nodded. Leaning down he kissed me tenderly. “I still love you. I will always love you. Never forget that.” Pulling his hands away he began to set his clothes to rights. “If you need anything… Call?”

I nodded from where I still lay on the floor… Naked.

“I mean it.”

“I know.” I gave him one of my best smiles. “Go home to your fiancée.”

John reached out and squeezed my hand before getting up and leaving.

It was the hardest thing I ever had to do.

^.~

My next heat didn’t come. One box test later confirmed that I was pregnant. 

Joy? 

Sadness…

^.~

John’s wedding was a beautiful affair. Mary was beautiful… John was beautiful. There was an abundance of love and good wishes from their family and friends. I stood at John’s side as his best man. Thankfully my morning sickness came in the evening so no one thought it strange when I slipped away while everyone else was dancing. An hour’s rest put me to rights and I rejoined the party.

“Where did you go?” John asked.

“Go?” I found it difficult to believe that he would notice my absence. 

“Yes, I…” And then he stopped. Leaning in to me he took a deep breath. “Sherlock… Are you…?”

“Mary’s pregnant.” I stated. I had smelled the change in her too. Her pregnancy wasn’t as advanced as my own but it was still noticeable, especially to another omega.

“What?” John gave me a confused look and then to his bride. “Mary?”

Mary turned to her husband and smiled. “What is it, John?”

“Sherlock says you’re pregnant.”

Mary paled and looked down at herself. “Oh… gods… I didn’t realize… But… Yes. It makes sense. How did I not see?”

I shook my head. “You were distracted with the wedding plans. It is easily overlooked except to another omega.”

“Pregnant?” John looked at Mary in wonder. “I’m… We’re…” They hugged and I made my escape. 

At that moment I didn’t want John to ever know about my own condition. As I fled into the night I pondered my choices. I couldn’t terminate my pregnancy. Something within me instinctually wanted to protect my alpha’s child at all costs. It was the only piece of John I could have. I could put the child up for adoption… What did I know about raising children? It was only by accident that I even conceived. How was I to know that he would enter the flat while I was in heat? So far the adoption idea was winning. It hurt to know I would not be involved in the raising of our child… But it was a better life than what I could offer. I may be an omega… But without an alpha bonded to me I was a horrible candidate as a single parent.

^.~

My trousers were beginning to get too tight the next time John came to the flat alone without Mary. But that’s not what gave him pause. His nostrils flared and I knew he had caught my scent. I knew it was coming. All the pregnancy research I had done told me that the baby’s pre-natal scent would be like the alpha that sired them. And there had been plenty of murder scenes where the baby’s scent did not match the alpha the omega was bonded to. “Tea?” I asked, indicating the tea things Mrs. Hudson had left behind.

“Sherlock…” John’s voice faltered as he bit his lips. 

I poured him a cup of tea and prepared it to his liking before presenting it to him.

John accepted it and sat down upon his chair, regarding me. “How long?”

“Oh John… Don’t be so stupid.” I sighed as I sat down with my own cup of tea.

“Yes, I know when it happened…” John shook his head and frowned. “I mean… How long have you known?”

“The usual… Lack of discomfort that usually comes when an omega’s body deals with a failed heat. And then the big indicator three months later when my next heat never happened.”

“But that was before my wedding!” John protested.

I nodded and took a sip of my tea.

“You knew you were pregnant at my wedding and yet you… You… I thought I smelled something but I thought it was Mary.”

“It was Mary.” I pointed out.

“It was both of you!” John snapped.

“Would you rather it was known that the groom had helped the best man through a heat and got him pregnant?”

John set his tea down so he could run his hands through his hair. “You weren’t on birth control… Were you? I should have asked. What the hell was I thinking?”

“You were thinking, ‘Here is an omega practically begging me to mount him.’”

“That’s not what I meant!” John snarled. “Oh gods… What do I tell Mary?”

I set my own tea aside and stretched. The baby made it difficult to sit for long periods of time. “In olden days this wouldn’t have been an issue. Alphas took as many omegas as they wanted. Alphas were entitled to as many omegas as they could provide for.”

“This isn’t the olden days. We have monogamy now.” John sighed, wearily.

“We have monogamy now.” I agreed and stared at my alpha with a longing I couldn’t exactly hide. 

“You should have told me. I offered to stay with you… Be your alpha. I offered, Sherlock.”

I shook my head. “You already gave her your word you would marry her. You were never mine to keep.”

“Of course I was yours! I was yours long before I even met Mary.”

We were silent for a time, lost in our own thoughts. I, of course, did not completely believe John’s words. If he was mine there never would have been a Mary.

“What are you going to do about the baby?” John breathed.

I pulled out of my thoughts to look at him. “Baby?”

“Once the baby comes. What will you do? Babies demand a lot of time and energy. You won’t be able to work. Are you planning on hiring help?”

“I thought about adoption.” I answered truthfully.

John took a quick breath as if I had hurt him. 

“I don’t have the means to take care of a child on my own.” I informed him. “No alpha… I may be able to hire someone but…” I shook my head. “The best I can hope for is that someone in my family would want to foster and give them a home.”

“I’ll take them.” His response was quick, unexpected.

“What?”

“It’s my child too… I’ll take them. I’ll raise them along with their sibling.”

“John… I can’t ask you to…”

“You’re not asking me. But it’s my responsibility. This is my baby, Sherlock. I will make sure he or she is loved and cared for.”

“What about Mary?” I responded.

John shrugged. “She will find out as soon as she smells you what I’ve done. She’s already nesting for our own child…”

“You can’t put this on Mary. It’s not fair to her.” I rubbed at my face. Pregnancy made me feel itchy sometimes.

“You never cared for the feelings of any omega I dated before.”

“She’s your wife, John.”

“She wasn’t yet my wife when you came back. She wasn’t yet pregnant when I helped you through your heat. There were so many times you could have stopped me from making her my wife. All you had to do was ask.”

“I left you behind. It was my own fault.” I got up from the chair, suddenly uncomfortable. I felt huge and bloated even though I know I wasn’t yet showing and I still fit within my old clothes. But soon everyone would know… Know by scent who sired the bump that was growing in my belly. Too soon the Yard, Mary… The whole world would know of my moment of weakness. It would have been better had some random alpha wandered in off the street… But everyone knew John’s scent. I soothed the presence within my belly. Sometimes I think they can feel emotions or react to their omega’s chemistry.

“Sherlock…” John sighed behind me as I stared out the window. His footsteps approached from behind me and I felt his arms wrap around my body. “You’re not a martyr. You left to protect me.” Lightly his lips kissed my neck. “I should have bonded with you when I had the chance.”

“Even though monogamy is the norm… Our species thrives on polygamy. Have you ever wondered why the ratio of omega to alpha is so unbalanced?” I closed my eyes and try to reason my way through his attempts to comfort me. “You are driven by your natural biological impulse to breed as many omega as will have you.”

And then I felt his teeth bite down.

I closed my eyes, pleasure washing through my body from feeling the bond bite. I wanted to bite him back but I bit my lips instead, taking in deep breaths as his scent began to change. 

John licked the wound and then turned me around to face him. “The baby is mine, Sherlock. You don’t have to do this alone. I am your alpha… Sire of your child. I take full responsibility and claim you… And the child.”

Numbly I nodded, feeling a little light headed. John caught me before I fell.

^.~

“I had to… I couldn’t just… I am so sorry, Mary.” John’s voice drifted in and out of hearing.

“He’s waking up.” Mary’s voice stated from somewhere near my left. 

I blinked open my eyes, becoming aware that I was in a hospital bed with various IV attachments. “What?” I managed.

“You haven’t been taking care of yourself properly.” John stated from my right.

I turned my head to regard him. “John?”

“You’re pregnant.” John hissed at me.

I rolled my eyes and looked away.

“You require proper rest and nutrition if you want our baby to be healthy.” John lectured me.

I sighed and closed my eyes again.

“Sherlock… This is serious.”

“I didn’t even have an alpha.” I answered. “Unbonded pregnant omega don’t thrive well during pregnancy… Something about alpha pheromones being critical for… For…”

“Development? Yes… I know that. Why do you think I bit you?” John answered. 

That just hurt me more. John bit not because he needed me or wanted me… But because without it our baby would not develop properly.

“Just… Rest. We’ll talk about the living situation later.” Awkwardly he patted my shoulder.

^.~

And that’s how John moved back to his old room at 221B. Mary joined him. It was a matter of space. My flat had two bedrooms along with communal area… The flat John and Mary rented had one bedroom and a sofa. Of course I had Mycroft keep up their rent, knowing that once the child was born they would want to move out. 

John’s scent permeating the flat did healthful things that benefited my pregnancy. My morning sickness subsided… My appetite increased. My body began to change shape as the baby made itself known to the world by not only its scent but the bulge around my middle. 

Work became a bit awkward. Getting down to the level of the victim was easy enough… But getting back up again became an exercise of humility. Sometimes John helped me… But when he wasn’t there it fell on Lestrade. I could ignore the giggles and the snide comments about my state. When John was there they were quieter, not wanting to anger my alpha. But with John at the clinic I was left on my own more often than not.

One afternoon during a particular gruesome case Lestrade helped me to my feet. “Are you ok, mate?”

I looked at him, horrified that he could somehow sense my misery. “What do you mean?”

Lestrade took a deep breath as if to assess my scent. “The victim…”

I glanced down at the victim… Male… Omega… Pregnant… Unbonded. The only scent of his alpha came from the child he carried and that was weak. The child wasn’t thriving long before the death blow came. And yet the scent left at the scene… “The killer was the alpha who got him pregnant. He was angry that the omega didn’t take birth control during his heat. The alpha already has an omega… He…” My voice gave out and I turned away from the scene to regain my composure. 

“Sherlock…” Lestrade touched my arm. “It’s alright… We have enough to go on.”

I shook my head. 

Lestrade leaned in close, his hand touching the back of my neck where John bit me as if to remind me it was there. “John loves you. He would never hurt you the way this one hurt his omega. Do you understand? John would never hurt you. He didn’t reject you… When you needed him he bonded with you.”

“He doesn’t love me.” I whispered so only Lestrade could hear. “It is his duty as an alpha to make sure my pregnancy succeeds.”

“Even then… That’s a lot more than this poor omega got from his alpha.” Lestrade’s hand slide down my arm to tighten on my bicep. “Go home. Get some rest. We can handle this. You pointed out that the killer’s scent was masked by the child’s. That’s plenty to go on. Get some rest, Sherlock.”

I pulled away from Lestrade and straightened my coat before walking off the crime scene. I never felt so useless in my whole life.

^.~

When Mary set a plate before me I poked at the contents with my fork, unsure if I really wanted to eat or not. I wasn’t in the mood for things like… Transport maintenance.

“Eat. The baby needs it.” Mary set her own plate down and began to eat.

I pushed the plate away before setting my chin on my hand. 

“Sherlock… I promised John I would get you to eat.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t promise impossible things to John.”

“You will have to eat some time.”

“Will I?” I gave her a questioning look.

Mary pushed my plate back towards me. “Please?”

I shook my head and bit my lips to show that not a morsel would pass between them.

“Sherlock…” Mary sighed, setting her own fork down. “This isn’t good for either you or the baby. Eating is important.”

“What’s the point?” I asked.

“You need nutrients for the baby to grow strong and healthy… Otherwise you will have unnatural cravings for non-food. If you don’t get enough calcium the baby will take it from your bones. You need iron from the increased blood volume pumping through your body. Folic acid for the baby’s brain development…”

“And alpha pheromones?” I demanded.

“That’s… More psychological. You need the peace and safety that comes with having the sire of your baby protect you. Without that you will become increasingly stressed and your body may spontaneously abort. Only half of unbonded omega make it to full term.”

“It’s unfair.”

Mary shrugged and took another bite of her food. “But that’s the way it is.”

“Omega outnumber alpha.”

Mary swallowed and then licked her bottom lip. “That’s why I didn’t protest when John bonded with you. I know it’s the only way for your child to survive.”

“John isn’t my bond mate.”

“Maybe that’s your problem.” Mary wiped her lips with her napkin. “It’s affecting you because you refuse to see that he’s done the right thing for you. You don’t see him as your mate.”

“He’s not my mate. He bred me… And… I messed up. I should have been on birth control. I should have pushed him away and never let him touch me. I went off my suppressants to find a mate and instead… And instead I accidentally stole yours.” I stood up from the table and tossed down my unused napkin. “Now if you’ll excuse me… I believe I deserve my misery because I’m a pretty terrible human being!” And with that I stomped off to my bedroom and slammed the door… Locking it for good measure.

^.~

John knocked on the door that night… Of course he did. Why wouldn’t he? He’s a doctor and a healer… My being out of sorts would be right up in his area of expertise. But I refused to open the door to him. “Sherlock? Sherlock please open the door…” The knocking went on for almost fifteen minutes before he gave up and went away.

^.~

“You’re not looking well.” Lestrade commented.

I gave him a nasty look and returned my attention to the victim.

“I’m serious. Are things alright at home?”

“As well as can be expected.”

Lestrade looked around before stepping close to me to speak in a whisper. “Is John giving you enough… Sex?”

I nearly tripped over backwards to step away from Lestrade. 

Lestrade gave me a surprised look. “Oh, Sherlock… You NEED to let him touch you.”

“I do not!” I protested.

The DI gave me a critical look and shook his head. “Gods… You really don’t know much about pregnancy. You NEED him. Your body needs him.”

“He’s MARRIED!” I snarled at Lestrade.

“Yes… Married. To both of you.”

“No!” I took another step away.

“That’s what the bite on your neck means. He is your alpha. Your body needs him. Go home. You’re no use to me like this. And don’t come back until you’ve let him do what he has to do for you.”

I nearly cried. For several minutes I just stood there, staring at the crime scene and Lestrade’s back as he turned away and did his best to ignore me. Why couldn’t he understand that this wasn’t a normal pregnancy? I messed up and now John was forced to live with me or else risk losing the child he sired. John married Mary.

Finally I walked away. I walked at least a mile. The whole time I was miserable. Mycroft’s town car slowed and stopped for me twice but I ignored it until I flagged down a cab.

As I got out at 221B I encountered someone I hadn’t expected. “Janine?” It was Janine… Mary’s friend… An alpha female.

“Sherlock!” Her smile was warm, genuine. 

What had I learned about her? Oh yes! She worked for CAM… A person of interest. “What are you doing here?”

“I was just visiting Mary and…” And then my belly caught her eye. “Oh my…”

Self-consciously I touched my bump. “It… It was an accident.” I stated with the proper amount of shame.

Her nostrils flared as she identified my child’s sire. “John did this?”

I looked properly embarrassed. “He walked in on my last day of heat… And you know alpha nature. I wasn’t taking birth control because I thought I was spending my heat alone. It was an accident.”

“But there’s a bond?”

I shrugged. “Gestational bond.” Such a thing was not unheard of. Temporary bonds were needed if our society was to function, especially since omegas outnumbered alphas and gestation was inhibited without a bond.

“Oh…”

“I didn’t want to terminate my pregnancy and I plan to give the child up for adoption.” I stepped closer to her, delighted that she didn’t take a step back. It helped that she was attracted to me to begin with. I knew that from the wedding when she had attempted to flirt with me. “These things happen… Right?”

“Right.” Janine smiled. “So… You’re not really bonded?”

I shook my head. “Not really… Once the baby is born…” I touched my swollen belly. “It shouldn’t be long now. Then I’ll be free to make a permanent bond with someone else.”

“Oh!” I could see she was interested. Alphas liked the idea of a fertile omega. “Are you… Looking for an alpha?”

I smiled at her… A perfectly charming smile. “If I was… Would you be interested?”

“I… That is… Would you like to go out sometime?”

And that’s how I got a date with Janine the day I felt the worst about myself.

^.~

I did not let John or Mary know that I had plans for a date. What did they care, anyway? I was just the carrier of John’s child. Lestrade had to be wrong about my need John to have sex with me. Besides… I felt much better after talking to Janine. 

The next day I met up with Janine and together we took on normal date places. British museum… Although my ankles were swollen by the time we made a circuit of Ancient Greece. I took her out to a nice restaurant. At no time did she seem to be disturbed about my belly… In fact it seemed to hold some fascination for her. “So fertile…” Her voice whispered in awe as her hand lightly touched my abdomen. 

“Is that what you want?” I asked. “An omega to get pregnant?” 

“The miracle of life every omega can be a part of…” She mused.

“You’re female… Can’t you…?”

Smiling at me she shrugged. “I suppose I could. But it’s not the same. Omega are the next step in evolution. They are the most fertile. Even a male omega is more fertile than a female alpha.”

“There are some down sides.” I admitted. 

“Such as?”

“Gestational bonding.” 

Janine smiled at me. “Sherlock Holmes… Any alpha who only wants you to breed is insane. You are… Gorgeous… And smart.” Leaning forward her lips brushed my own. 

Deep inside me I felt John’s child move in protest. The scent was wrong. It was John I desperately wanted to kiss… Not Janine.

Janine giggled and placed a hand on my belly, feeling the movement and mistaking it for random movement. “You should pick an alpha who will worship you for the genius you are.”

I saw a flash of light. Someone took our picture. Good. Let CAM see… Maybe that would make him sloppy. I could imagine the headline… “Knocked up omega Sherlock Holmes making out at local restaurant with an alpha not his baby’s sire.” It would sell a million copies. 

Janine paused in her kissing. “The world is watching.”

“Let them watch.” I whispered back. “I have nothing to hide.”

Janine kissed my lips and my chin. Her mouth worked its way over my neck and she paused when she encountered John’s bite at the back of my neck. Carefully covering the bite back up so no one could see she nuzzled against my ear. “Why are you really doing this?”

“Your boss has to see me.” I whispered back. “Can you make it look good?”

“Of course I can!” Her hands cupped my cheeks and she hungrily took my mouth, nearly climbing into my lap. 

By the time we left the restaurant Janine was giggling as we held hands. “That was a lot of fun! I never made a spectacle of myself in public before.”

“You will make a lot of money… The woman Sherlock Holmes caused a scandal with.”

“I love it!” Janine laughed. We were halfway back to Baker Street when she stopped. “Do you want to take me to bed?”

I blinked at her. “I…”

Hastily she took my arm and pulled me down the street to my flat. I opened the door and we stumbled in and up the stairs to the flat and my bedroom. Thankfully neither John nor Mary were up to see us come in. When the door was safely closed Janine sat on the bed. “You don’t have to have sex with me… I just thought it would add to the story if I was seen entering your flat and then leaving in the morning.”

“Oh…” I sat upon the bed to regard her.

“You’re in love with John.” Her statement was simple.

“Why do you say that?”

“You’re carrying his baby to term. You could have terminated it, especially since you weren’t bonded to him.” Janine reached up and touched the back of my neck… To John’s bite. “That’s not a gestational bonding bite. He really bit you. And it’s recent.” Her fingers lightly caressed my mark. “And I recall everything you said and did at John and Mary’s wedding… It was obvious that you really love him.”

I sighed deeply, unsure what to say in my defense. 

“So… You were pregnant at the wedding? I knew I smelled something off about you.”

I nodded. “I didn’t want to ruin their day.”

“And you’re farther along than Mary…”

“After John helped me he offered to bond with me. But I told him to go to Mary. Because she deserves him far more than I ever… More than…”

“Hey!” Janine wrapped her arms around me and pulled my head to her shoulder. “Don’t say that. You are worthy.”

“I left him.”

“You came back.”

“He’s in love with her. She’s in love with him. I have no place… No place…”

Janine began to rock, holding me as if I was a child. “I’m sorry.” Kissing my forehead she directed me to lay upon the bed. Curling up beside me she rested her hand on my belly. “Are you really going to put your child up for adoption?”

“John wants… Him. It’s a boy. They forced a prenatal exam on me… Brought home equipment because I refused to go to the clinic. It’s a boy. John and Mary plan to raise him along with their own child… Mary isn’t far enough along to find out the gender of hers.” 

“A boy.” Janine lightly stroked my belly. “You’ve given John a son.”

“Thank you…” I whispered, closing my eyes.

“What for?” Janine asked quietly.

“Being so kind to me.” I answered.

I felt her lips on my forehead as I fell asleep.

^.~

The next morning I woke up alone. Getting up I wandered into the living room to find John staring in shock at Janine. Janine wore one of my shirts and little else. 

“Morning!” Janine greeted me and stood on tiptoes to kiss my lips. “I had fun last night.”

“You did? Well… I’m glad.” I kissed her back. “You can’t spend all day in nothing but my shirt… What will the neighbors say?” I teased her.

She winked at me and gave me another kiss before heading off to my bedroom… But not without giving me a swat on the butt. 

I was aware of John staring at me in shock. I stretched, feeling my shirt reveal my belly. “Well… I guess I’ll go take a bath.” I made a hasty retreat to start the water. 

Several minutes later Janine entered. Sitting on the edge of the tub she made some noises that made it sound like we were up to something. “Oh… Sherlock.”

I played along until she leaned down to kiss the top of my head. “I’ll see you later. Take care.” And with that she was gone. 

When I emerged from the bathroom and then my bedroom, dressed for the day I encountered John in the same spot where I left them. 

“That was… Janine?” John asked.

I sat upon my chair and picked up the paper. “Yep.”

“Mary’s friend… Janine?” John clarified.

“Where is Mary?” I asked, looking about the room.

“She had a… A… Never mind! Janine spent the night?”

“Yes.” I answered, looking up at John. “Problem?”

John glanced down at my belly. “You’re… Carrying my child.”

“I’m carrying one of your children… A son.” I replied, returning to the paper.

John swatted the paper away. “I created a bond with you.”

“No, you didn’t. Not really. It’s gestational.” I attempted to lift the paper but he wouldn’t let me. “Unhand my paper.”

“I bit you! You have my mark! I claimed you.” 

“And I tell you that you haven’t.” I answered.

“I can SEE it!” John retorted.

I stood up to stare him down. “We are not truly bonded, John Hamish Watson. You haven’t made all claims on me. At the moment our bond is gestational. Once the baby is born and I hand him over to you and Mary to raise, the bond will break. Nothing holds me to you aside from what’s growing inside of me and a mark on the back of my neck to keep me from miscarrying. We aren’t married. Now if you’ll excuse me…” I stepped away from him. “I have shopping to do.” Pulling on my coat I left the flat.

For my plan to work I needed something that would get me in the building… 

^.~

“What are you doing?” John snarled at me. As the night wore on he was losing patience with me. 

“Shut up!” I hissed back and tapped the key card. The video turned on and I smiled into the camera.

“Sherlock?” Janine’s voice called over the speaker. 

“Let me in.” 

“I’m not allowed…”

I raised my purchase in full view of the camera. “I need an alpha for my baby.”

Immediately the elevator dinged and I went to enter it. John joined me, looking almost livid. “What do you think you’re DOING?”

“Getting in!” I replied as the elevator made its way to the restricted floor. But when the elevator door opened something was wrong…

^.~

Mary raised the gun and pulled the trigger.

^.~

Once again I woke to find myself in hospital with an IV connection. Someone held my hand and I managed to turn my head without causing too much nausea. “John.” 

John pulled himself together and wiped the tears from his eyes. “Sherlock…”

“What is it?”

“You were shot.”

“I know.” I replied, glancing down my body. Something was missing… Something vital. 

“It triggered early labor. He’s… He has the best neonatal specialists in intensive care. But he’s early. Almost too early.” John’s voice broke into a whisper and rested his head against the bed, sobbing quietly against my arm.

And that was it. My heart seemed to stop as I registered his words. I was no longer pregnant. Our baby came early because Mary shot me… She didn’t target my uterus but her shot still triggered labor. There was nothing to keep me bonded with John.

“Please…” John cried, wiping his eyes against my hand. “Please don’t leave me.”

I was confused by his words, unsure who he was addressing. 

“Sherlock… Please… Please don’t leave me again.” His lips brushed against my hand. “I’m your alpha… I will always be your alpha. I want to make more babies with you and give our son brothers and sisters.”

“And Mary?” I whispered, remembering her look of horror at seeing me in Magnussen’s office.

“Just… Just promise me you won’t leave me.” John turned my hand over and kissed into my palm. “I can’t lose you again. Let me protect you. An alpha’s place is to protect his omega. I have two omega.”

At that moment Janine stepped into the room. “Hey, John.”

John pulled away from my side, tears still in his eyes and he gave Janine a look alpha give each other in challenge. 

“It’s alright. I just came to check up on him.” Janine smiled at me and took my other hand. “How are you feeling?”

“I’m fine.” I answered.

Janine smiled and raised my hand to kiss my fingers. “It’s too bad I never got the chance to help you through a heat.” 

“Yeah…” I chuckled softly even though it hurt to do so.

“It was fun…”

I nodded.

Janine turned her attention to John. “Take care of him or else I will take him from you… In a heartbeat.” With a bit of a kiss she was gone.

John looked between the door and me. “What was that?”

“What was what?”

“Weren’t you engaged to her last night?”

“It was a ruse.”

“You faked an engagement?”

“A bit.” I answered. “She is attracted to me… And her aid proved rather helpful in gaining access to Magnussen’s office. It gave me a believable reason to be there.”

“Did she know it was a fake engagement?” John demanded.

I shrugged before I realized how much it hurt to do so. “Yeah… I mean she was aware of the situation.”

“You used her!”

“She gets something out of it too. How many will want to offer her money on exclusive interviews regarding her relationship with me? Tabloids like that sort of thing.”

“But your reputation!” John shot back.

“My reputation? The reputation for getting knocked up by an unknown alpha? THAT reputation? Tabloids were already calling me a bit of a whore for walking around in public pregnant and unbonded.” I answered back. 

John tried very hard to control his temper. He did a noble job of it for at least thirty seconds before he broke. “Unbelievable.” Crossing his arms over his chest, he shook his head. “I thought you were leaving me… For her.”

I stared back at him. “If I was to leave you… It wouldn’t be for a woman.” I answered carefully. 

A look of surprise crossed his face and he opened his mouth to say something when the nurse came in. 

“Mr. Holmes? Would you like to be taken to the neonatal unit to meet your baby?”

“I…” I looked at John, unsure what to say to that. Focusing again on the nurse I nodded. “Yes… Please.”

It took several minutes before all of my IVs were situated around me in the wheelchair and I was pushed down the hallway.

They took me to the intensive care nursery and set me beside an incubator. There was a label… “Boy Holmes.” 

“He’s having difficulty breathing. His lungs aren’t yet fully developed.” A nurse told me.

I reached my hand in and lightly touched the child that was too small to be real. I had to know why… Why Mary did this to me.

^.~

And there it was… Mary’s motive out in the open where both John and I could hear it. No secrets, no cover… She had to shoot me or else risk having me look like Magnussen’s killer. If both Magnussen and I agreed that there was someone else there…

But none of that mattered when I was rushed back to hospital.

^.~ 

I woke up in hospital a third time in as many months. John was once again at my side but he was asleep, using my bed as a pillow. I fell back asleep, secure in knowing he was there.

^.~

After my official release from the hospital I was sent home. Michael, John’s son, was left in neonatal. Every day we returned to the hospital to watch his progress. I am told that our presence was vital for his success… Although my heart really wasn’t in it.

At the flat Mary and John still occupied John’s old room. When I did sleep John slept beside me on the bed. I wasn’t aware of it the first time it happened until I woke up the next morning to find him curled around me. We didn’t speak of it. I didn’t ask and he didn’t offer any explanation. It took me two weeks to realize that I hadn’t even seen Mary since I returned from hospital… And that John actually spent every night in my bed whether I was there or not.

A month after Michael’s birth I was examined and taken off pelvic rest… Whatever that meant. I started birth control because my heats could resume at any time and I didn’t want to have another accident with John still living with me. I began to wonder when he would leave. Perhaps after Michael was returned to us?

That night John came to my bed even though I wasn’t yet in it. I blinked up at him from where I sat with my laptop on my lap. John gently lowered the lid and put my work aside before tenderly touching my cheek. And then he kissed me. 

For several minutes I was lost with my lips against his. Something hungry and deep woke within me and I reached for him to hold him close. But then I remembered that he was married to the woman upstairs… A woman that had shot me. I pulled away.

John wrapped his arms around me and rested his head against my shoulder. “Can we…? Make love tonight?”

I startled, unsure what to say. “Why?”

“Because I need you.”

“But… Mary…”

“Sherlock…” John gave me a soft sigh as he curled up beside me. “Don’t you think I want to be with you too?”

“Why would you?” I retorted but obediently shifted so I was on my back, staring up at the ceiling. 

“Because I’m your alpha… And you’re my omega.” 

“Mary is your omega.”

“Stop being so damn stubborn about this.” John growled and sat up to straddle my hips. Leaning down so his face was in mine he nuzzled my cheek. “I bit you.”

“For Michael.” 

“Partially for Michael… Yes… But also because of who you are to me.”

“What am I to you?”

“You are mine… Sherlock. Do you want me to use alpha words so it gets through to you? You belong to me. Your womb is mine… All your babies are mine. I will fill you up over and over again. Everyone that smells you will know you are mine because my scent will come from every pore of your body. Is that what you want to hear?”

I shivered at his words, my hands reaching for his hips. 

“I want to be a proper mate to you.” John whispered against my lips. “Your next heat you will bite me and complete the bond… Alright? I want to feel your teeth… And smell the change in your scent when we’re done. I want to spend days stuck inside of you, making you cry out with pleasure. I want you, Sherlock.”

“Alpha words are so… Possessive.” I managed.

John chuckled softly and kissed me again. 

“But what about Mary?” I asked.

John pulled away and sat up. “She moved back to our flat.”

“Doesn’t she need you to help maintain her pregnancy?”

John shook his head. “It’s not like with you and me… I bonded with her during her heat. There’s no danger of her pregnancy ending because I’m not there.”

“You have to go back to her… She’s your wife.”

“She hurt you.” John answered. “She nearly killed our baby. Michael…” John rubbed his face with his hands. “Michael might not make it. I almost lost both of you.”

“But you didn’t yet have me.”

John gave out a sound that was halfway between a laugh and a sob. “Gods damnit, Sherlock… I already had you. I fucked you into the floor and gave you Michael. You were mine… And she almost took you away.” Curling up against me he lightly touched where the bullet had struck me. “Please…?” His hand slid down into my pajama pants and squeezed me. “You are mine… I’m never going to let you go…”

His alpha words were chilling and yet thrilling at the same time. My penis hardened in his hand and I watched with interest when he nuzzled me and then swallowed my length. “John…”

John pulled off, making an obscene popping noise as I escaped his mouth. “I want you on top this time.”

I blinked back at him. Typically alpha mounted omega, entering their vagina. “I… You don’t have a vagina.”

“I have an ass, don’t I?”

“It will hurt you.”

“You can’t hurt me any more than I am already hurt.”

“That is a horrible reason for you to do this!” I argued.

“Alright… How about this…” John got up and undressed completely before straddling me again. “I want to feel you inside of me.”

I felt my cheeks burn and looked away. “John…”

“Pretend… That I’m the omega and you’re the alpha. How would you claim me, Sherlock? What if I was the one in heat and I needed you?”

“I don’t have a knot… And you don’t have a vagina.”

“Pretend.” John whispered into my ear as he kissed my jaw. “I need you… To pretend. I need you. I’m begging you to knot me.”

I pushed him away and he looked back at me with tears at the edges of his eyes. I then pushed him down onto his back, hands on his shoulders as I situated myself between his legs. “You… Want my knot?”

“Yes.” John hissed and lifted his hips to me. 

“You want me to breed you and fill you will my children.”

“Oh gods, yes…” 

I stretched over to open the bed side table, looking for lubricant. Triumphant I retrieved a bottle and covered my hand in it before pushing two fingers into John’s ass.

John gasped at the intrusion. 

I stopped and stared down at him.

“Keep going.”

“Your body isn’t made for this.”

“Please, Sherlock… I need this.”

“We can easily switch places… I at least have the right parts.”

“Sherlock!”

I pushed two fingers into him, trying to relax the tight muscle. 

“That’s it… Stretch me.” John whispered encouragement. 

Hastily I pulled my fingers out and used some lube on my erection. “Should you be on your belly?” I asked.

“Do you want me to be on my belly?” John quirked an eyebrow at me.

“That’s what you did to me.” I answered. 

John smiled and used his leg to pull me down to him. “It doesn’t matter. And it’s not like you’ll be stuck in me… We can switch position later.”

I fumbled to push myself into place and eased into him, feeling him surround me for the first time. I let out a long breath as I stared down at him. 

John’s eyes were on mine. His hand reached up to push a stray curl from my forehead. “I love you.”

His words… His body… I closed my eyes and moved my hips feeling myself push in over and over again. I wanted to be part of him… To always be a part of him. And the sensations his body gave me were incredible. I could feel myself begin to fall over the edge and I felt John’s teeth scrape against my skin before biting down. I cried out and snapped my hips, feeling my orgasm overwhelm me. It brought silence to my mind and pleasure to my body… But then I heard John in my ear.

“Bite me, Sherlock… Please… Bite.”

I nuzzled against his neck and bit down, feeling him writhe beneath me, clutching my shoulders and wrapping his legs around my hips to pull me closer. 

John’s fingers tangled into the back of my hair, holding me against his neck. “That’s it, love… Claim me as your alpha.”

We lay together for some time in silence… Only gasps for air and occasional shudders of ecstasy. 

Finally I rolled off and John immediately curled up against me. Too soon we were both asleep.

^.~

A month later my heat came. John played his part and spent most of the time stuck inside of me. It was heaven with his arms around me and his teeth in my neck. 

The day after it ended we got a call from hospital… Michael was ready to come home with us.

^.~

“Oh… Sherlock…” Mummy reached for Michael as soon as John and I entered the house. “He’s beautiful.” Immediately she pulled him into her arms and retreated into the house.

“Your mum just stole our child…” John giggled from the porch.

“She’ll hide him so we’ll have to go home without him.” I answered as I entered the house just in time to hear Mummy’s voice from the kitchen.

“Look who came to visit us. Isn’t he precious? He says, ‘Hullo? Who are all these people I don’t know?’ Oh… Bless him.”

I followed her voice and found her holding out Michael to Mycroft. 

“It’s your Uncle Myc. Uncle Myc who can’t be bothered to give you cousins to play with.”

Mycroft frowned. “We never had cousins to play with…”

“And here is your grandpapa. Say hello, dear, to the baby.”

My father made a face and wiggled his fingers at Michael.

“Don’t be droll, dear. Here is your papa again. Is that what you’re calling yourself, Sherlock? Are you Papa or Da?”

“I’m Da.” John announced as he looked about the kitchen and caught sight of Mary. “Mary?”

“Happy Christmas.” Mary answered, already beginning to show the progress of her own pregnancy.

“Here we all are… The whole family. Oh I wish Mycroft had a special someone to invite. Don’t you wish that, Michael, darling?”

Michael despite his status as a preemie was beginning to show some milestones of babies his own age. At two months he was making the same progress as a one month old. That is to say… He was staring at Mum as if she had offended his ancestors and her punishment was the infant version of stink eye… That usually meant he was busy filling his nappy with poo. Babies are enigmatic creatures. I rescued my child from my mother’s clutches and left the kitchen to change him. 

Climbing the stairs I entered my childhood bedroom and spread out the changing things on the bed. “This was my room, Michael. I haven’t stayed here in years. Mum kept some of my things…” My eyes settled on a bear inside an ancient crib. I waited several minutes longer to make sure Michael was done before changing him. “I think she plans for us to stay in here while we visit. Although I don’t know how your da and I will fit in this tiny bed.”

At that moment John entered and looked around. “I heard your voice. Whose room was this?”

“Mine.” I answered as I handed him our child. “We should feed him and set him down for his nap.” I got up from the bed with the soiled nappy.

John gave me a smirk. “Look at you… All… Parental.”

“That’s because I’m a parent.” I answered.

John stepped up to me and pursed his lips for a kiss which I gave him. “Bottle in the bag?” 

“Yes.”

“It’s too bad he was so premature… It would have been rather exciting to watch you attempt breastfeeding.”

I rolled my eyes and went to go throw away the nappy and wash my hands.

When I returned I found Mary standing in the room, watching John burp Michael. 

“One hundred twenty milliliters.” John announced as our child gave a wet belch. “That’s a good boy.” John cooed as he wiped the spit up from Michael’s face.

“I’ll put him down for a nap. You go talk to Mary.” I took the baby from John’s arms and shooed him off towards his wife. They left together and I watched them go. When they were safely away I looked down at the child in my arms. 

His scent was mostly John’s… A defense mechanism for newborns to appeal to their alpha sire’s instincts for protection. Underneath it was his own unique scent that would assert itself once he was no longer a helpless infant. 

I kissed his forehead, taking in John’s scent. “I may not be coming back.” I whispered to the drowsy baby. “There is a thirty percent chance that what I’m about to do is suicide. But you’ll be safe here. Mum, dad and Mary will take care of you.” I sat on the bed and allowed Michael to grasp my finger. “And I’ll try to get your da back to you.” I nuzzled the top of Michael’s head, wallowing in his scent. “I was never meant to keep you. I wish it could have been different… But that’s how it is.” Getting up, I kissed Michael’s forehead before placing him in his bed. “I love you.”

Satisfied that he was asleep I went downstairs. There was work to do and an appointment to make.

^.~

Magnussen made my flesh crawl with apprehension. The alpha oozed with possession of everything in the room which made my stomach turn even with my own alpha at my side. 

“Tell me, Sherlock Holmes… Was his knot everything you dreamed?” Magnussen casually took another sip of his drink. “You completely ruined both of your lives with only thirty minutes of selfish ecstasy. Was it worth it to be a second place mate with a bastard child pinning you down? The only reason he bonded with you is because you were pregnant with his bastard.”

I bit my inner lip, desperately trying to keep Magnussen’s words from affecting me.

“And you, Dr. John Watson. You should know better. Sherlock may have been inexperienced when you knotted him, but you knew better.” The man smirked over his drink. “Then again… Virgin omega have their appeal, I suppose. Was it the tightness of his body surrounding your knot? Or was it the idea that you were the first for an omega in his mid-thirties? That’s a bit late. One would think there was something wrong with him...”

John remained stoic but I could see small telltale signs of his distress, hearing Magnussen’s poison.

“Does talking about your paramour and bastard bother you? Why don’t we talk about your wife instead? Naughty woman…”

The odds of our survival were quickly dwindling.

^.~

And I knew Magnussen would make good on his threat and completely destroy John’s life. I knew from the perverted glee when he flicked John in the face. There was no doubt in my mind that he would take down my alpha and his family in an effort to get to Mycroft. And so I did what I had to do…

I took John’s gun and ended Magnussen. 

^.~

I awoke in a holding cell with Mycroft looming over me. “Brother dear.” Mycroft gave an imperious sniff. “You were warned…”

I sat up and looked about what usually was an interrogation room. “There was no other way.”

Mycroft frowned. “I do not appreciate being drugged and having my things stolen.”

“I had to find out what he had on Mary.”

“The things on Mary Watson could have her removed from your alpha’s life completely… And yet you defend the woman even though she was the one that shot you and triggered early labor. You died on the operating table, brother dear. My nephew almost didn’t make it… And yet you protect her.”

“John loves her.”

Mycroft made a face. “Sentiment.”

“Yes… Sentiment. How did you find out about Mary?”

“John attempted to bargain for your release. I then did a little digging with what vague information he let slip. Magnussen is not the only one with the ability to dig. I encountered the same sources he did. What I found surprised me.”

“She’s retired… And now she’s Mary Watson, wife of John Watson.”

“John Watson… Your alpha and sire of your child.”

I gave a sigh and closed my eyes, shaking my head.

“I can’t protect you, Sherlock. What you’ve done… I won’t say it was in cold blood. It was a crime of passion to protect your alpha, his wife and their child… Magnussen provoked you by threatening your alpha.”

“He said he would destroy John and Mary. I could have lived with him destroying my life. But…”

“But he brought John into it. I understand. I still can’t protect you… But you knew that already. We found the letter you left in Michael’s bag, naming John, Mary and our parents as his guardians should something happen to you. You did not expect to live.”

I stared down at my hands. 

“It has been decided to send you on that suicide mission I mentioned earlier. I’m sorry. Would you like to spend one last night with your alpha?”

I shook my head. “Don’t tell him. Let him believe I’ll come home.”

^.~

I went away on a mission that was supposed to end with my death… And I called back four minutes later. Life is strange like that. Stay of execution…

^.~

Mary went into labor the same day I went into heat. “GO with her!” I exclaimed, already feeling my body burn with need.

“I have enough time to at least help you through one wave.” John answered, standing his ground as I attempted to push him out the door to hospital.

“Your wife is in labor!” I snarled.

“My husband is in heat!” John gave as good as he got. 

“Are you two done fighting yet?” Mary demanded from the doorway before making a face and panting through a contraction.

“Go with her to hospital!” I sat down on the couch and instantly regretted it with how sore my backside was. “Childbirth is more important than heat.”

“Who decided that? And what do you know? You were unconscious when you went through labor!” John shot back.

I gave him a look before my own body betrayed me… Warm fluid escaping from me, filling the room with pungent scent of my heat. 

Mary gasped and sat down as my pheromones overwhelmed her.

“You both need me!” John cried out, turning this way and that to look at us both. “What am I supposed to do?”

“Thank gods Michael is with Mrs. Hudson…” I answered. “Take Mary to hospital… Please?”

John looked to Mary, unsure. “One round, Mary? He needs this.”

“Don’t mind me…” Mary answered. “I can go get my bag together.” 

John helped her up from the chair. “Take a shower too… You never know when you’ll get to take another one.”

“Just don’t take too long. The contractions are far enough apart.” Mary lightly kissed John’s lips before toddling off to the bathroom.

“Right…” John approached me. “Can you get up? We probably shouldn’t do this out here.” Taking my arm he helped me to my feet and led me into the bedroom where he undressed me and pushed me back onto the bed. “This is really bad timing.”

“I have toys…” I answered, annoyed that he ignored my pleas to take Mary away. 

“I need to bite you.”

I blinked at him.

“Mary is about to have a baby… It messes with our home dynamic. I need to reaffirm our bond before I go into alpha sire mode, helping her birth our daughter.” Awkwardly he began to undress until he was just as naked as I was. 

I continued to blink up at him, never having heard that before. Immediately he was on top of me, sinking his teeth into my neck. “Mine.”

I opened my legs to him and felt him push in and thrust. I held his shoulders as he made feral noises of ownership in my ear. “John…”

John pulled his head back just as his knot expanded to full girth. “Gods, Sherlock…” His breath was hot and damp against my face as he pressed our foreheads together. “Please don’t… Come on… Bite me.” Guiding my lips to his neck, he held the back of my head until I bit down. “That’s it…” Lazily his hips gave small thrusts even though he was trapped inside of me. 

I clenched down on him and we both cried out in delight.

Several minutes later we both got our breaths back but he was still stuck. Lightly his lips kissed my neck and his tongue cleaned where he had drawn blood. “Can you do this on your own?”

“My heat?” I asked quietly.

“I’m sorry I can’t be here.”

“You have more important things to do.”

“Fuck, Sherlock… Our family is the most important thing to me. You, Mary… Michael… Our daughter. All of you are important to me. It’s just… Bad timing.”

“I’ll be fine.” I answered him. “I still have a drawer full of toys… Just in case.”

We lay together for another twenty minutes before he was able to pull out. Even then he lay upon me. “Do you… Want another baby with me?”

I startled at his question. “Won’t your hands be full with the new one about to come?”

“We can think about your next pregnancy, though.” 

“Maybe I’ll leave the babies to Mary. I am not the best parental figure. I barely know what to do for Michael… And he’s rolling around now. He never stays where I put him.”

John chuckled softly against my shoulder. “Just think about it.” Kissing my lips, he made the kiss just a bit deeper for a few seconds before pulling away to smile down at me. “I want to have more children with you.” Brushing the curls from my forehead he kissed my nose and then gave me one more bite to the neck before getting up. “I love you.”

I felt myself blushing, laid out before him on the bed like some debauched feast… His semen leaking from between my legs. “I love you too.” I answered.

Leaning down he gave me another kiss before pulling away. “I should probably go shower. You will come once your heat is over, right?”

“I’ll come.” I whispered. “I must meet our newest addition.”

“And think about having another one with me…” John gave me a smirk and left my bedroom. Two seconds after he left I ached for him.

^.~

I stared at the newborn in my arms, unprepared for the longing hunger within me. I wanted to have another one… To be able to hold them and not have to wait by an incubator. I felt a little robbed that I didn’t get to have the same experience with Michael. “She’s beautiful.” I murmured to the proud parents. “She looks just like her mummy.”

Mary blushed and smiled. 

John, the proud alpha sire, beamed at me. “I can give you another one.”

I smiled at him. “Tempting.” The newborn smelled of John, making it easy to hold her and imagine she was my own.

“Tempting? Is that all?” 

“Possible.” I amended as I passed the sleeping baby back to her mother.

“Possible?”

“Possible.” I repeated with a smile at my mate.

After all… Michael should have plenty of younger siblings close to his own age to play with or else he might grow up to be like his Uncle Mycroft. Heaven forbid…

\--Finis


	2. John's POV

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is John's POV. It starts when Sherlock is sent to the hospital the first time for fainting after John bit him. I suppose it might be nice to blend the two into one loooooooong chapter. But I'm lazy (and it would require use of italics). ;p
> 
> Enjoy!

“What have I done?” I asked Mary. We both sat in Sherlock’s hospital room, watching the omega sleep. “I should have known… I should have realized…” 

“You didn’t know… And he didn’t tell you.” Mary responded. “I won’t pretend I’m thrilled about this. You could have told me you helped him through his heat. If there was any chance of him conceiving your child it would have been nice to know about it.”

“I thought I smelled something at our wedding…” I frowned at the unconscious man in the bed. His belly was no longer flat, evidence of what we had done. “But he deflected the attention to you. He knew… He knew he was pregnant and yet he stood beside me and… Gave me away.” I took a deep breath to steady myself. “Why couldn’t he tell me?”

“I don’t know.” Mary answered. “You… Bit him?”

“I had to bite him. You know that. Without it he’ll miscarry. I couldn’t just walk away and let that happen. If he wants to keep this baby he needed at least that from me. I am so sorry, Mary.” 

Between us Sherlock’s eyelids flickered and he frowned.

“He’s waking up.” Mary checked Sherlock’s vitals.

Sherlock’s eyes blinked open, unfocused, unsure. “What?”

How could he not know? His labs were a mess for any pregnant omega. His reason for fainting had been dehydration and not enough nutrition. “You haven’t been taking care of yourself properly.” I told him.

Sherlock looked at me. I saw confusion and worry in his eyes. “John?”

How could he not know how important it was to take care of himself during pregnancy? Had we not seen enough death? “You’re pregnant.”

Sherlock rolled his eyes, annoyed as always whenever I tried to tell him something important. 

“You require proper rest and nutrition if you want our baby to be healthy.” 

And then he gave me a put upon sigh as if what I said didn’t matter.

“Sherlock… This is serious.” I tried pleading with him.

“I didn’t even have an alpha. Unbonded pregnant omega don’t thrive well during pregnancy… Something about alpha pheromones being critical for… For…”

It hurt to hear him struggle for words. I felt horrible knowing I had done this to him… Taken away his freedom and forced a child upon him. “Development?” I offered. “Yes… I know that. Why do you think I bit you?” It was the least I could do since Sherlock didn’t actually want me as his alpha. He’s never wanted me in that way.

Sherlock made a face as if what I said disturbed him. I suppose it would if I found myself accidentally bonded to a man I didn’t even love because I was pregnant with his child. But there was no time for that. Our first goal was to get Sherlock healthy so the baby would thrive. 

“Just… Rest. We’ll talk about the living situation later.” I patted his shoulder.

^.~

And so I returned to my former life at 221B Baker Street. I went to work… I went on cases. I did both. I made sure both Mary and Sherlock ate properly.

^.~

“Sherlock…” Mary began one night as we lay in bed together.

I woke from my light doze. “Hmm?”

“I think Sherlock is in love with you.” Mary answered.

“You mean he loves me as a friend…”

“No… I mean he’s actually in love with you.” Mary replied and rolled over onto her side to face me. 

“He… Can’t be.” I whispered… And yet I felt my pulse rush at the idea. “Why would you say that?”

“Have you seen the way he looks at you?”

“Could it be the pheromones? Both of you are pregnant and it does things to alphas.” 

“It’s not just that… Do you love him?”

“In what way?”

“The way you used to talk about him… It was like… There was something more between you that you never acted on. And then when he comes back and no longer on suppressants you…”

“Yes. I love him. I’m sorry.” I felt shamed at the admission. There I was, in bed with my wife, admitting I loved the man who slept downstairs.

Mary lightly touched my cheek and kissed my lips. “He loves you too. And he needs you. You know what the experts say… You need to maintain the bond you created, especially if you bonded with him outside of heat, later in his pregnancy. His body needs to know that you’re his alpha and that you’ll take care of him. You have to…”

“Oh gods…” I rolled onto my back, digging my wrists into my eye sockets. I knew exactly what I had to do. Hearing Mary talk about it didn’t help. 

“It should be easy enough if you both admitted that you love each other.”

“He… But he never wanted me. And when I offered to be his alpha he sent me away.”

“Well… He needs you now.” Mary answered.

^.~

I knew I had to talk to Sherlock about it, but I could never get him to stop long enough to ask him anything. It was like he was avoiding me. The only time I got to be in the same room with him is when Mary pinned him down to do an exam.

Sherlock lay on the couch, nervously tapping his foot and staring off into space as if he wasn’t involved in the proceedings. 

Mary had squirted goo on Sherlock’s exposed belly and was busily working the wand around to get the views she needed to make the measurements. 

I sat in awe, watching as a small squirming thing took over the screen. “Wow.”

“Here’s a hand… A kidney… Stay still so I can measure.” Mary guided us through what we were seeing on the monitor along with trying to get the tiny being to cooperate. “And… Oops… Oh… Do you want to know the primary gender?” Her question was addressed to Sherlock.

Sherlock gave a shrug, but he couldn’t hide that his eyes were on the monitor.

Mary maneuvered the wand and then the baby’s gender was clear. 

“It’s… A boy?” I asked, looking to Mary for confirmation.

“That’s usually what that part means.” Mary smiled and winked at Sherlock.

But Sherlock didn’t see her. His eyes were wide, mouth open as he stared at the figure on the screen.

I reached out and placed my hand on top of his. “That’s our son, Sherlock. He’s perfect.” I squeezed his hand.

For a moment Sherlock squeezed it back before he took a deep breath and let go. His eyes shut and he resumed his uncaring demeanor. 

“I’ll send the video to my obstetrician to make sure I didn’t miss anything. I wish we could have gotten him in to see her.” Mary commented as she began to clean Sherlock’s stomach of the goo. “You won this round, Mr. Sherlock Holmes.”

“You are a nurse… And John’s a doctor.” Sherlock answered.

“You’re lucky I had experience working the machine… And that we were allowed to borrow it since you refuse pre-natal visits.” Mary answered as she got up to finish cleaning up. “John… Talk some sense into your omega.” And with that she left the room.

“What makes you think he’ll actually listen to me?” I called after her. But she was gone so I looked down at Sherlock instead. 

“Don’t start…” Sherlock sighed as he sat up.

“I’m trying to do the right thing. You don’t have to do this alone. I’m here… I want to take care of you. Please… Just tell me what you need.”

Sherlock shook his head and got up from the couch. “I don’t need anything from you.” And with that he walked away.

^.~

One afternoon Mary called me in tears. “What’s wrong?” I asked.

“It’s Sherlock. I think I said something that bothered him. He’s locked himself in his room.”

When doesn’t he lock himself in his room? That seems to be the reoccurring theme since I moved back in with him. I stared at the paperwork I was finishing. “What did you say?”

“I don’t know what hurt him. I said I didn’t mind too much that you bonded with him to help him keep his pregnancy. He blew up at me and said he wasn’t your bond mate… And that he regretted getting pregnant… And stealing you from me. He said he felt like a horrible human being.” 

I stared at my desk, unsure what to say. “Do you want me to come home?”

“No… Just… You need to talk to him, John. This can’t be healthy for your baby.”

I agreed and hung up. A moment later I tried Sherlock’s mobile but he refused to answer. I went back to work but my mind was not on it. The whole point of Mary and I taking partial leave was so that someone was always home for Sherlock if he needed anything. My days home with Sherlock sometimes involved cases.

When I got home later that day I tried knocking on Sherlock’s door. “Sherlock? Sherlock please open the door.” There was no answer. I tried all I could think of to get him to respond but he refused. Finally I gave up. 

^.~

I didn’t see Sherlock for almost a week even when I was home. I could smell that he had passed through the rooms but I always missed him. Mary saw him. It hurt to know I was being avoided.

^.~

I wasn’t expecting Janine. And in that moment it made perfect sense… The distance and the evasion. Sherlock was looking for another alpha to take my place. I should have been relieved, but instead I was hurt. I loved him… And I lost him. He faked his death and left me alone to mourn his death as if I had lost a bond mate. That’s what it felt like. Even though we had never shared a heat before he left I felt like in some way we were bonded. But then he died. And I was so alone.

But then he came back… And he was in heat and he wanted me and… But he didn’t really. He never loved me the way I loved him. 

“Janine spent the night?”

“Yes… Problem?” His answer was somewhat flippant and smug as if he hadn’t just ripped the heart out of my chest.

“You’re… Carrying my child.”

“I’m carrying one of your children… A son.” And then he went back to his newspaper as if I wasn’t there… As if I didn’t matter.

Frustrated, I swatted the paper away. “I created a bond with you.”

“No, you didn’t. Not really. It’s gestational.” He tried to ignore me, but I wouldn’t let him hide. “Unhand my paper.”

“I bit you! You have my mark! I claimed you.” 

“And I tell you that you haven’t.” His answer was cold.

“I can SEE it!” Hearing him just tore into me more and more.

He stood and loomed over me at his full height making me feel small and insignificant as I already felt. “We are not truly bonded, John Hamish Watson. You haven’t made all claims on me. At the moment our bond is gestational. Once the baby is born and I hand him over to you and Mary to raise, the bond will break. Nothing holds me to you aside from what’s growing inside of me and a mark on the back of my neck to keep me from miscarrying. We aren’t married. Now if you’ll excuse me…” And with that he stepped away. “I have shopping to do.” With a flutter of coat he left the flat.

I collapsed into my chair. I was nothing to him… Nothing at all. He was my best friend… My heart and soul and yet I was NOTHING to him but the biological sire of his offspring… An offspring he planned to abandon because in his mind it was a mistake. And so I wept. For almost an hour I helplessly sobbed like a child. 

After a shower and a strong cup of tea I began to feel a little human again, although there was still a sharp ache in my chest and my throat didn’t seem to be working properly. Towards evening I got a text message from Sherlock to meet him at CAM’s building for a case he was working on. 

Well… Before I idiotically fell in love with a man who was incapable of loving me back I was his colleague. I could be his colleague if that’s all he wanted from me. I told him I would give him anything he needed… And if this is what he wanted… So be it.

^.~

Hearing him propose to Janine just twisted the knife deeper into my heart.

^.~

I heard the gun shot and ran towards the sound. I flew up the stairs, expecting the worse. It was. I assessed his condition as I called for an ambulance. After I gave them our location I focused on Sherlock. My beloved, infuriating Sherlock… His skin was pale and cold as he struggled through shock. “I’m here, love… I’m here…” I told him over and over. Time seemed to stop and yet the next thing I knew the paramedics were there and I was flying down stairs and into the back of the ambulance. I don’t recall much of the ride to hospital. I wasn’t allowed into the operating room. Shortly after he entered a doctor emerged to tell me that the baby came and was sent to intensive care.

At some point Mycroft was there… As was Lestrade. Someone guided me to wash my hands which were still covered in Sherlock’s blood. Someone gave me clothes to wear that weren’t blood stained. Tea was placed in my hands and I numbly drank.

Doctors told me things about Sherlock’s heart stopping… About it resuming on its own… How he gasped out “Mary”… How Sherlock was in recovery and would soon be moved to a room. Eventually I was guided into a room to see him hooked up to too many IVs and tubes. I sat beside his bed and waited for him to come back to me.

^.~

When he woke up I poured my heart out to him. I wanted him to know how much I wanted to be with him. 

And then Janine showed up and I found out that their engagement had been a ruse. She told me to take care of him… I wanted to tell her I had been trying to but Sherlock wouldn’t let me. When she left I demanded to know what he had been doing. “I thought you were leaving me… For her.”

“If I was to leave you… It wouldn’t be for a woman.” 

I gaped at him. He… Wasn’t leaving? But he had said all those horrible things… That I wasn’t his alpha and that he didn’t consider us bonded. I wanted to ask him why he said all those things when the nurse came in to take him to see the baby.

^.~

Mary… How could you? How? 

He DIED! Sherlock died! Our son is fighting for his life and you… You did this? How could you?

I went with Sherlock back to hospital and stayed at his side. He needed me… My true mate needed me at his side and I wouldn’t leave. 

I’ll never leave him again. I should have stayed with him and not let him send me away. I should have bond bit him then. I should have held him and never let him go. I never should have let him doubt that I loved him with all my heart for even a moment. I never should have let him believe he was second place. He was never second place. Never. All those others were because I thought I couldn’t have him. But he was always my first choice. After the war he taught me to live again. And without him I would have given up. When he died I lived on for his sake… To keep him alive when the rest of the world forgot about him. Mad, brilliant, beautiful… My Sherlock. I never should have moved on. I asked for a miracle and he gave me one… I should have held onto that with every fiber of my being when I found out he wanted to settle down. 

And Mary almost took all of that away from me. He died. His heart stopped. His heart…

I looked up from where I sat in my vigil. His eyes were closed in drugged sleep. I got up and leaned over him, kissing his cool lips. “I want to be a proper mate to you. Will you let me, Sherlock? I belong with you.” I brushed the tangled curls from his forehead and watched his sleep. 

^.~

I took Sherlock home to our flat. I made sure he ate and slept to properly recover. I went with him back to hospital to see Michael. 

Michael… The baby’s name is Michael. I gave him my father’s name… Because Sherlock had no interest in naming.

At night I slept in Sherlock’s bed whether he was there or not. The first morning he woke up in my arms he seemed a little surprised but he said nothing about it.

I made sure Sherlock went to all of his appointments. I made sure his wound was healing properly and that his body was recovering from pregnancy and childbirth. I wondered if his distance from Michael had to do with being unconscious during childbirth… Or perhaps it was postpartum. I monitored his moods.

One month after Michael was born I sent him off to the andocologist obstetrician who had been keeping his file. Sherlock returned with birth control.

That night I asked him to bond with me. And he bit me hard as we made love. It felt like heaven. 

^.~

“When are you leaving?” Sherlock’s voice woke me. We lay in bed together with his body curled around mine. It was late.

“Leaving?” I echoed.

“When are you going home?” Sherlock asked.

“I am home. This is my home.” I answered. I felt his nose press against where he had bitten me repeatedly the past few weeks. 

“What about Mary?”

What about Mary? “She hurt you… She hurt Michael. I don’t want to… Not anymore.”

“She’s your wife.”

“That doesn’t mean I have to go back to her.”

“Your child needs you…”

“You need me.” I felt his lips on the back of my neck. “Sherlock? I’m your mate now.”

“I don’t want you to divorce Mary.” 

I turned over in his arms, trying to see his face in the darkness. “Why the hell not?”

“I… Just don’t think you should. She didn’t mean to kill me. She avoided all vital organs.”

“That’s not a reason!” I fumed at him.

“You were happy with her.”

“I’m not happy any more. She hurt you.” I reached out and touched his cheek. “I belong with you.”

Sherlock wrapped his arms around me and pulled me in for a gentle kiss before tucking my head under his chin. “She’s the mother of your child. You can’t abandon her… That’s not the John Watson I know.”

“It is when I am betrayed and my love killed.”

“I lived. Michael is doing well. Only a few more weeks… You’re a good man, John… The best… Kindest person I have ever met. The fact that you love me or want to show such devotion is… Overwhelming.”

“Please don’t make me do this…” I clung to him. “Sherlock… Don’t send me away. I love you.”

“I just think you need to be there for Mary. She’s your wife… No! Don’t protest. You must forgive her as you’ve forgiven me. She never meant to hurt you.”

I held him tightly, feeling his heart beat through his sternum. “What about you? I want to be with you.”

“You just… Can’t shut Mary out of your life. You forgave me… You must forgive her.”

“Do you love me, Sherlock?”

“It is because I love you…” His voice was soft and gentle as I felt his lips kiss the top of my head. “You must forgive her and be there for your child. The John Watson I know and love is loyal and devoted to those he cares about. You love her. She gave you back your life after I destroyed it.”

“I don’t know if I can be her alpha anymore…”

“She can give you things I can’t.”

“Like what?” I demanded.

“Public snogging? Hand holding…”

I chuckled softly at his ridiculous reply. “And you won’t snog me in public?” 

“I’m not the most romantic person…”

“It’s a bad reason.”

“Well then… How about because I ask you to make your peace with her? We are on the same side against Magnussen. She is our client. She is part of your family, mother of your baby. Fighting with you puts stress on her pregnancy.”

“I’m still not moving out. You’re stuck with me.” I stated, kissing his neck.

“But you will make your peace with Mary.”

“If I must.”

“You must.” Sherlock insisted. One of his hands reached down to cup my genitals in his hand and he lightly squeezed them. 

“Don’t change the subject.” I moaned.

And with that he pushed me onto my back and began to kiss my neck. Many times over the past few weeks I found myself suddenly awake because he was hungrily kissing me. We were already naked. Sherlock sleeps in the nude and I… When in Rome… “My heat is coming.”

“Is it?” I asked as he nibbled on my left nipple.

“Mm…” Mouth full of me, straddling my leg like a pro. 

“Do you want me to leave?” I asked, suddenly fearful about his answer.

Sherlock bit down.

“Ouch!” I cried out and wrapped my arms around his head.

Sherlock shifted a bit, his groin somewhere near my knee. “I would have you stay and do it properly for me… As a mate would.”

“I am your mate.”

“All the more reason to do it properly.” His lips lightly kissed where he had bitten my nipple. “It’s a pity you cannot knot outside of heat.”

“Biology… It’s to ensure conception. You’re taking your birth control?”

“Of course, John.” His lips grazed my sternum.

I shivered when he said my name. It was his low, seductive growl. 

“You’re hard.” Sherlock stated.

“Because you’re rubbing up against me and talking about heat.” I replied.

“You have a heat kink.” 

“I have no such thing!” I responded with a laugh. “I just happen to have my omega rubbing up against me, talking about our future.”

“And that turns you on?” 

“Eternity with you turns me on.” I whispered and lightly kissed his lips. 

“Everyone dies, John.”

“Shut up.” I murmured against his lips.

“I nearly died.” Sherlock breathed.

I pushed him over onto his back and straddled him, trying to silence him with my lips and tongue. Sherlock’s fingers were gentle on my back, caressing my spine from base to neck and back down again. His fingers pushed into me. It made me gasp and he took the opportunity to nuzzle against my neck, teasing his bond bite. “Sherlock…” 

“I died for you… Twice.” His fingers took me, pushing in deep. “She can give you the stability I can’t give you.”

“She’s a fucking assassin!” I cried out, rolling my hips against his, thrilled that he was just as hard as I was.

“You’ve killed for me.”

I suddenly remembered the cabbie. “I did that to protect you.”

“As I would protect you…” Sherlock whispered and bit down on my neck.

I cried out and rocked against him. My climax was suddenly upon me just by his teeth claiming me. For a time we were both boneless as we lay together. I rested my head on his shoulder because his teeth held me in place. 

Sherlock finally unclenched his jaw and licked the new bite clean, kissing my jaw and nipping my earlobe before kissing my forehead. “You have to live, John. Mary can protect you.”

“I don’t need protection.” I answered, exhausted by my orgasm.

“Yes… You do. My John…”

I snuggled up against him, uncaring that I was wallowing in the mess we created. Our combined scent was strong in my nostrils. It gave me peace. “I’m the alpha… I should be the one doing the protecting.”

“I need you to take care of Michael.”

“I thought we were raising him together…” I was beginning to doze.

Gently Sherlock pushed me onto my back and I felt him clean the semen from my belly. His lips brushed the corner of my mouth as he arranged himself beside me. “If something should happen to me… You need to survive, John. Mary will protect you and you both will protect Michael.”

“Sherlock…” I protested. His words confused me. Or perhaps the onset of sleep was causing my brain to hear things wrong. Did he mean to send me away after all? “I’m still your alpha?”

“Of course, John.” Sherlock whispered with another kiss. “From now until… Until my death. I promise.”

^.~

Heat was… Wasn’t like anything I had experienced before with Sherlock. No matter how many times I filled him he wanted more. I rutted until my knot was chafed and my bollucks were sore. I admit that more than once I was regretful that none of my semen would get Sherlock pregnant again. Birth control has its downside. But it was too soon after Michael’s birth to even consider that. Sherlock reacted to my mindless alpha words about getting him pregnant. Over and over he begged me to breed him, to fill him. I am embarrassed to think about all those words our biology forced us to say in the heat of the moment. None of them sounded like us.

On the second day I found myself between kneeling between his knees, his cock in my mouth in a frenzied attempt to get him off. I swallowed around him, feeling him at the back of my throat, his girth making my jaw ache. And then I felt his hand on the back of my head. My eyes met his and I was struck with how clear they were as they regarded me. Sherlock rapidly blinked and I realized he was about to cry. 

Quickly I pulled off of him and climbed up his body to kiss his lips. “It’s alright…” I soothed.

His arms wrapped around me, holding me close. “John… John I’m so sorry. We should have done this ages ago. I didn’t realize just how little time we had.”

His words worried me and I held him against me. “I’m here now.”

“I love you.” 

His words filled me with surprise. “Sherlock? But that’s sentiment…”

“Screw ‘sentiment.’ I love you, John. It should have been me who married you. I regret that. Can you forgive me?”

“Yes, love.” I answered.

“I meant what I said at the wedding. I will always protect you. You are the most important person in the world to me. Even if we never do this again…”

“Why would we never do this again?” I demanded. “We love each other. I’m your alpha.” I rested my forehead against his, breathing in his expelled air. “Why?”

His arms wrapped around my waist. “We can’t know what tomorrow brings.”

“Bullshit!”

One of his hands opened on my back, covering my scapula protectively. “John… I couldn’t tell you before I jumped. I couldn’t warn you. I’m… Warning you now. So when you think back on this you will realize I did the right thing this time.”

I was confused and hurt by his words. “What are you warning me about?”

But Sherlock bit his lips and closed his eyes.

And I knew. “You think you’re going to die?”

“There is a high probability of that scenario playing out.” Sherlock breathed, his voice breaking.

I lightly kissed his lips. “Magnussen? When you go… Take me with you.”

“No… You need to be there for Michael when he comes home.”

“Sherlock… I’m your alpha. Take me with you. If I can improve your chances of survival…” I studied his reaction. “Will my being there improve your chances of survival?”

“Yes…”

“Then take me with you.” I curled up against him. “You don’t have to do this alone. I’m here for you, love. Promise me you won’t leave me behind. We’ll face this together. Do you promise?”

I waited for him to respond. It took him almost a full minute. As time dragged on I feared he had chosen to ignore my request. But then…

“Yes.” His arms cradled me against him and he kissed my forehead. “If you promise to make peace with Mary.”

“Anything you want. Anything…” I sighed.

^.~

It wasn’t easy to look at Mary. I occupied my attention with Michael who seemed to be eating as slowly as he possibly could even though I was eager for him to finish his bottle so I could put him down and escape. “You hurt me, Mary.”

“I am so sorry, John.” Mary answered, placing a hand on her protruding belly as if to remind me that it was our child within her. 

“But… I have to forgive you.” I blinked up at her. “But if you ever… EVER hurt Sherlock again…”

“I won’t. I promise.” 

“He’s my omega.” I breathed. Just then Michael’s bottle finished and I heard the telltale sucking air noise. Hastily I pulled the nipple from his mouth and arranged the spit up cloth and my son over my arm to pat his back. “I don’t know if I can move back in with you. Sherlock and Michael need me. You can move back in with us.”

“Whatever you think best…” Mary whispered. 

And then Sherlock entered the room.

^.~

I was numb with shock, staring at my omega who stood with his hands up in surrender. My gun was on the ground at his feet and he kicked it away. Beside us Magnussen lay in a pool of his own blood. Sherlock had taken no chances… It was a kill shot. Soldiers took Sherlock and dragged him away.

I stood, numbly staring after him until someone led me away from the body my omega had placed there. 

^.~

“Mycroft please… You have to listen to me!” I begged the elder Holmes brother. “Sherlock did this… ALL of it for me! He couldn’t let Magnussen destroy me or my life. He wasn’t in his right mind! He was provoked! Do you understand? Magnussen threatened me. I will swear it to anyone… Sherlock was protecting me.”

“You? But you’re married to another omega.”

“I know, yes. I know.” I bowed my head in a submissive way to the other alpha who sat behind his desk. 

“You haven’t been living with Mary. Why?”

I closed my eyes and shook my head. 

“And the bond bite on your shoulder is from my brother. Why did you leave Mary, mother of your child? Sherlock’s bond bite is deep and fresh. Why would you switch from your dear wife to Sherlock? What has she done to make you change your mind?”

I blinked at the alpha, trying to make him understand my sincerity without having to say the words.

“You left Mary when Sherlock was shot…” Mycroft mused. Surprise passed over his face momentarily. “Mary shot Sherlock.”

“It wasn’t a kill shot.” I replied helplessly.

“It was a masterful shot… Only a professional…” Mycroft stopped and stared at me. “Is there anything else you wish to tell me, John?”

I shook my head. 

Mycroft pulled a letter out of his desk and placed it on the blotter before him. “This was found in Michael’s bag when we went through Sherlock’s things. Do you know what it is?”

I again shook my head.

“This is Sherlock’s last will and testament. He names you and Mary guardians of Michael. Imagine that? The woman who shot him is named guardian of his only child… One must wonder why.”

I blinked at Mycroft, unsure what else to say.

Mycroft leaned in to address me in a soft tone. “He wrote a will… He did not expect to survive this.”

“Please, Mycroft… He did it for us.”

“I am sorry, John.” And with that Mycroft dismissed me.

^.~

I watched the plane fly away and I knew in my heart that I would never see Sherlock again. He had planned for this outcome. Something in his eyes told me that the goodbye was final. I had to be strong for him. I had to survive as I had promised him during his last heat. I had to be strong.

But then his plane returned.

^.~

It was a whirlwind of activity and adventure. Once again we were side by side as we took on the world. The only real change is that many nights we slept together, his body curled up against my own after our passionate love making.

It seemed the more dangerous the adventure, the more exciting the sex that came afterwards. 

Mary moved back in with us. At Sherlock’s urging we resumed something of domestic arrangement… Until one afternoon when Sherlock pushed me towards the stairs to my old room. “Go have some time with your other omega. I have to think and you’re distracting.”

“I don’t think I can…”

Sherlock gave me a look. “Go have relations with your wife, John.”

“Sherlock…” I objected.

Sherlock leaned in and kissed my forehead almost chastely. “You’re her husband.”

“I’m your husband.” I countered.

“I’m busy right now… And she needs you. You may as well go patch up your physical relationship.”

“Sherlock…” I cried in frustration.

His lips brushed against my own as he held me. “I’m good for now. I don’t expect I will sleep again for another 48 hours. Use that time to reconnect with your wife. I’ll want you back when I’m done.”

“Are you sure?”

Sherlock scented my throat and under my ear. “Yes… Now go! You are distracting.” Playfully he pushed me towards the staircase. 

I obeyed his command.

48 hours later I was pinned beneath him in our bed. I still smelled of Mary even though I had washed. Sherlock took me hard, his nose pressed to the back of my neck as he growled. “Mine…” 

I bowed my head and relaxed beneath him. It occurred to me that Sherlock would have been a fantastic alpha. When in the proper mood he certainly knew how to show dominance. It also occurred to me that the reason he insisted that I spend time with Mary was so my scent would change enough for him to establish his territory. “Yours…” I murmured into the pillow. His teeth clamped down on my neck, almost completely obliterating the small mark Mary had made during our time together. I cried out and climaxed beneath him as he went still above me. “Fuck… Sherlock…” I whimpered.

Sherlock curled up around me, rolling us over onto our sides. “Mine…”

I held his hands and closed my eyes, his scent washing over me.

^.~

I looked in on Mary nursing Violet. A fond smile crossed her face as she held the newborn to her breast. “Do you need anything?”

“I’m good.” Mary answered.

“Good… I’ll be downstairs.” I left my former bedroom and headed downstairs to the living room. I found Sherlock laying on the sofa, facing the back. Between him and the back cushion lay Michael. Sherlock shifted his legs to the back of the sofa as I sat down so they were pinned behind me. “You fed him?”

“Mm…” Sherlock replied, rubbing a foot against my back. Casually he indicated the bottle sitting on the coffee table. 

I leaned over to pick it up, freeing Sherlock’s feet. One of them moved to rest in my lap. I set the bottle aside and touched his ankle, playing with his long, bare toes. I kissed his knee and rested my head on his thigh to stare down at our slumbering child. 

“I… I think I want another one.” Sherlock whispered, lightly touching Michael’s curly red hairs on his head. 

“When?” I asked, wrapping my arms around my omega’s hips.

“There’s never a convenient time…” Sherlock admitted. “Perhaps now… Before we get too old?”

“It doesn’t have to be right away.”

“I’ve stopped taking my birth control. My next heat…” Sherlock bit his lips and wrapped one of Michael’s curls around his fingertip.

I kissed my detective’s hip. “I love you.”

Sherlock reached down and rested his hand on my head, pressing me against his hip. “My John.”

“Yes… Your John.” I agreed.

\--FInis (and I MEAN IT this time!)

**Author's Note:**

> I finished this one yesterday (yay!). I started it a few weeks ago but I held off on finishing/posting until PBS aired the episode since it relies heavily on people seeing the episode to fill in narrative gaps.
> 
> And in case you're wondering... I have two little boys and my eldest was born at week 34.5... My water broke early. He spent 8 days in the NICU before he could be sent home with us.
> 
> I have no idea if being shot can trigger early labor... Or if heroic measures were made to deliver the baby after Sherlock "died" on the operating table. I'm vague about it... Sorry.


End file.
